What No One Tells You
The birth is over, your baby is here, and that “pink cloud” everyone talks about is supposed to begin. But for many mothers, the experience feels different. Your body aches, your emotions are all over the place, and you wonder if you’ll ever feel like yourself again.
This is the raw truth about postpartum recovery – and it deserves to be spoken about openly.
Your body doesn’t feel like your own
After nine months of pregnancy and giving birth, it’s only natural that your body needs time to heal. But what few people tell you is that this healing doesn’t always happen easily.
You may be dealing with stitches, a C-section scar, or an overall tenderness in your pelvic area. Urinating stings, sitting hurts, and even standing upright can feel like a challenge.
Some women also experience incontinence – a common but rarely discussed issue. You might leak urine when laughing, sneezing, or even just getting up. Pelvic floor exercises can help.
Did you know that in France, every new mother is entitled to 20 free sessions with a pelvic floor specialist? To us, that speaks volumes about how real this issue is.
Your belly may also remain swollen or “pregnant-looking” after birth, which can be mentally tough if you expected your body to snap back quickly.
Sleep deprivation changes everything
You probably expected to get less sleep, but the impact of chronic sleep loss is hard to grasp until you’re living it.
Exhaustion affects your mood, concentration, and even your healing process. Feeling emotional or irritable is completely normal – your body is begging for rest while your baby needs you.
Sleep deprivation can even affect your memory and sense of reality. Some mothers describe feeling disconnected or like they’re living in a fog.
It’s important to take these feelings seriously and talk about them. If possible, nap when your baby sleeps, and accept help from others so you can recharge, even just a little.
Crying fits and hormonal rollercoasters
In the first few days after giving birth, you might experience the “baby blues.”
This is a natural result of the hormonal shift your body undergoes after delivery. Your estrogen and progesterone levels plummet, which can make you feel extremely emotional.
Sometimes this phase lasts longer and develops into postpartum depression or anxiety – something that still isn't talked about enough.
It’s important to know the difference between normal baby blues and signs of postpartum depression.
If you feel down for weeks, can’t enjoy anything, or feel disconnected from your baby, it’s essential to seek help.
There are therapists and support groups who understand what you’re going through – you're not alone. Your doctor can guide you in the right direction.
Postpartum recovery takes longer than six weeks
Many mothers hear they should be “recovered” after six weeks.
The truth? Your body (and your mind) often need much longer. Some women don’t start feeling like themselves again until six months or even a year later.
It’s so important to set realistic expectations and give yourself permission to heal at your own pace.
This six-week idea is often fueled by postpartum checkups that end around that time. But that doesn’t mean your symptoms magically disappear.
You might still deal with pelvic instability, back pain, reduced muscle strength, or a feeling of being “disconnected” from your core.
Physical therapy and postnatal care can help enormously – but you often have to find and fund these resources yourself.
Intimacy feels different (or not even on your radar)
Many women experience pain during sex after childbirth or have no desire for intimacy at all.
This can be due to physical changes, but also pure exhaustion or emotional depletion.
If you’re wondering, “How am I supposed to feel like it?”, you’re not alone. Take your time and communicate with your partner about what you need.
Your feelings about your body may play a role too. You might feel insecure about scars, stretch marks, or the way your body has changed.
Intimacy doesn’t have to mean sex right away. A hug, holding hands, or simply being close without expectations can mean a lot.
The pressure to "bounce back" to who you were
Society often expects mothers to return quickly to their pre-baby bodies and routines – and social media only fuels that pressure.
But the truth is: you’ve changed. Motherhood transforms you in ways no one can truly prepare you for.
It’s okay to take your time and rediscover who you are now.
That might mean your goals, priorities, or interests shift. Maybe you don’t want to go back to work right away, or your social life looks completely different.
Give yourself permission to redefine your path and choose what fits in this new season of life.
What Can You Do to Support Your Postpartum Recovery?
- Listen to your body: Rest as much as you can and don’t push yourself.
- Ask for help: From your partner, family, or a professional – you don’t have to do this alone.
- Talk about your feelings: Postpartum emotions can be overwhelming, but you are not alone.
- Use products that support your healing: Think of maternity pads, a peri bottle, breast compresses, perineal sprays, comfy underwear, supplements, and heat packs.
- Seek specialized support: Such as a pelvic floor therapist, lactation consultant, or postpartum coach.
- Be kind to yourself: You’re doing amazing, even on the days it doesn’t feel that way.
Let’s Normalize the Conversation
It’s time to stop romanticizing motherhood and make more space for honest, real stories.
Because while the postpartum period can be magical and beautiful, it can also be raw, intense, and full of challenges.
By opening up about the hard parts, we give other mothers permission to be honest about their experience too.
And that’s exactly what Essentuary is here for: to offer a safe space, with products that truly support, and stories that truly connect.
Postpartum recovery isn’t a sprint – it’s a marathon.
Let’s break the silence and the pressure, and give mothers the space to heal, speak, and be seen.
